THREE FOUNDATIONS OF LOVE: MEASURES OF HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP
Is there a perfect love? What is the basis of that perfect love that everyone wants to have?
Love is one of the most complex emotional feelings. It is a state in which a person experiences many emotions such as passion, pain, excitement, happiness, sadness in a short time. Robert Sternberg has developed criteria for love with the Love Triangle Theory. According to Robert Strenberg's Love Triangle, healthy love has three basic components: Intimacy, passion, commitment. Different types of love are formed by the combination of these criteria. Two of the three components are dominant in relationships. Love with all three components is called perfect love, but it is rare.
Intimacy; includes emotional sharing, moral support, trust and sincerity in the relationship. Effective communication and empathy form the basis of the relationship. This tends to strengthen the bond between individuals.
Passion; includes romance, physical attraction, sexuality and enthusiasm in the relationship. This brings excitement and intensity to the relationship. Passion fuels the romantic relationship and brings intimacy between partners.
Commitment; is about loyalty, responsibility, trust and the desire to maintain the relationship. It includes the duration of loving the person and maintaining it. The maintenance of this commitment depends on the level of satisfaction obtained from the relationship.
Love depends on the strength of these three and their interactions. According to Sternberg, it is possible for the relationship to be perfect if the elements exist in a balanced way in the relationship. However, the components of the people in the relationship may be different. While one person may have commitment, the other may have passion. Balancing and strengthening commitment, passion and intimacy in relationships forms the basis of a healthy and satisfied relationship. Robert Sternberg's triangular theory of love suggests that the combination of the three components of love in different ways creates eight types of love; lovelessness, liking, infatuation, empty love, romantic love, friendly love, foolish love, perfect love.
Lack of love; there is no commitment, passion and intimacy. There is no love, connection and relationship. May include obligatory relationship. Liking; is a relationship without passion and commitment. Includes friendships and acquaintances.
Infatuation; there is no intimacy and commitment. It contains only passion. It is not a serious relationship. A crazy love is fed to the other party, it is thought that it cannot be done without it.
Empty love; there is no intimacy and passion. It is seen in arranged marriages and logic marriages. Relationships can start as empty love, there is a possibility of change over time.
Romantic love; there is passion and closeness but no commitment. Physical attraction is intense, the relationship does not last long. It can be a one-night stand.
Friendly love; there is closeness and commitment but no passion. It can be seen in long-term relationships. Sincerity is at the forefront.
Foolish love; there is passion and commitment but no intimacy. It can be associated with love at first sight. Passion may end over time and the relationship may end.
Perfect love; includes all intimacy, passion and commitment. Love is complete, perfect and healthy. It represents an ideal relationship.
Three-component love is the basis of healthy relationships. The balance of these components is the bond of a happy, fulfilling and long-term relationship. However, every relationship is different and partners may experience the components differently. Therefore, strengthening and balancing these three components in relationships is important to ensure the sustainability of a happy and healthy relationship.
REFERANCE:
Atak H., Taştan, N. (2012). Romantic relationships and love. Current
Approaches in Psychiatry, 4(4), 520-546.
Sternberg, R. J. (1997). Construct validation of a triangular love scale. European Journal of
Social Psychology, 27(3), 313–335.
Sternberg, R. J., Hojjat, M., & Barnes, M. L. (2001). Empirical aspects of a theory of love as
a story. European Journal of Personality, 15(3), 199–218
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